When I crossed my 30th mark, I realised that everything/ anyone else don’t matter except for the immediate family.
It was also in times of desperate measures and needs that I realised, no one will stay by you except family and soul mates.
Having say that I would like to dedicate this post to my smelly brother, Marco. :X
We could have been twins if I’m born in Jan tho, with us just 11 months apart. This smelly brother had been my sidekick for the whole of my happy, sad, angsty and etc of my super memorable childhood, be it the ups or downs.
I managed to dig up some pictures. For obvious reasons, I picked those that I look quite chio in. LOL.
Actually hor, if you are reading this, I do know that you are quite intellectual just that previously too lazy to study, otherwise, I think you would have become a high flyer than me.
Anyway I made this special dedication to him because I had seen him revolved from a playful gamer to someone who worked super duper hard for the family despite not having much certs.
Honestly, I think that the workaholic genes run in our blood and to someone who had walked up from where we fall, we can grow and appreciate better in life.
Really grateful to have you as my bloody yandao sidekick for the past 30 years!
And some, even went to the extent to commit suicide over bad grades and critics.
The conversation with the girls especially Sharanne set me thinking about the expectations from (1) Parents, (2) Childrens/ Peer Pressure and lastly (3) the Society.
From Kids’ perspective, they only see as Exams, Stress, Breakdown.
On a legit note, the girls always shared with me that the majority of their friends had super packed schedule for the week and near to 90% are focusing on academics, some took up the music schedules as parents assume that it was a form of de-stress and based on the instrument that the parents like instead of what the kids love. And the reason?
They are too young to make decision so as Parent we have the responsibility to plan out for them.
Precisely. And that’s also the point that they are young that they might not be capable enough to handle the stress and negative emotions.
So it set me thinking, what went wrong and what could we (as Parents) have done better?
I have friends who are on #TeamTuitionIsLife where Tuition plays a major big role in their lives and its everything they that do. The removal of tuition will make them “handicap” and unable to move on positively. Kids of #TeamTuitionIsLife normally have no much choices on their own and would need to obey the lesson plans crafted out by their parents, for their own good. Sounds familiar? Out of 10 friends, 8 of them fall into this category.
The remaining minority belongs to the #ChillMom where everything is possible and I belong to this category. Not even a single class of tuition/ enrichment and every weekend is just time spent with the kids.
I personally think that sometimes some kids will need enrichment to facilitate and motivate learning but don’t overdo it. Find a right balance. Keep the signs in check. Mentality is important for parents. Don’t yell and threaten on bad grades. It ain’t everything.
Kids felt more stress when parents compare as the (2) Peer Pressure is real. And just to be honest that kids are more sheltered as per compare to the kids 20-30 years ago. The latte developed grit to deal with things while kids of today need some parental grips, making them more vulnerable to critics.
I guess I focus on the different aspects – Soft Skills where I call it the EQ instead of IQ (Academics). The girls had been taught, social media skills, entrepreneurship, customer relations, product different and etc… Importantly I feel that parents need to teach kids how to manage failure or in nicer words, I call it, managing the not ideal situation. That’s why I curatedLittle Towkay Entrepreneurs Bootcamp for the kids, in order to give them a more holistic experience.
Acceptance is important. I do not have the greatest mind and will never do well in Maths in this lifetime. What I can do is to accept this weakness and hunt for my strengths. I can’t possibly force myself to be a Mathematician. Grades are not everything.
That’s why if I believed my kids can do well in Arts. The focus and the shift will be towards the SOTA direction. Afterall, who’s gonna teach the future generations the arty farty stuff if EVERYONE focus on the academics? Who’s going to teach ballet when everyone graduated as a lawyer or doctor? 😉
There’s always a Master in every profession, tio bo?
Afterall, I would rather spend the time and money spent on something that they love, so that Iwould get a positive ROI. Otherwise I’ll be waste my time and money on something that they do not even like/ love a teeny tiny bit and worst, do not learn from or make no change to one’s life.
Having 4 kiddos and to balance on that economy of scale is hard. Need to maximize the assets so I would emphasize on:
Getting them to learn something that they love.
Tell them Academics is not everything. Attitude is.
Accepting failures (and not scoring more than 85/ 100 is ok)
Enjoy their childhood. 🙂
Personally, this is what I would do and remind myself to do better than to surrender and join the #TeamTuitionIsLife.
No doubts, Society play a part too. We need more parents like this to overturn the mentality that focus strongly on grades and adapt more towards character development.
To parents out there, don’t let anything or anyone guilt trip you. The most important thing that you can provide to the kids is your time and love. 😊
Parents gonna walk the talk before a change is well-noted within the education system and system takes time.
Hit me up if you are keen in the Children Bootcamp.
And so last Saturday, I went back after hearing that they had introduced some soupy dishes and here is my verdict. Sedap for the soup. 😉
Shall let the pictures do the talk.
Updated menu, the old menu still exist but I think the new set of 3 is easier to reference with a picture by its side.
The spiciness of both the Kolo Mee and Mee Soto can be adjusted in accordance to personal preference. And the soup had a strong savory flavour despite me asking it to be less or no chilli. AND the bonus — they did put up the Kolo Mee Instant Noodles via the Pick&Go section of the shop. So if one is keen to buy it home, just order via the counter. 😉
And I’m fazed by the cold brewed tea selection that Gryphon Tea has. 🙂
Anyway to me, if I’m around the corner, I would definitely go and get my bubble tea fix at Nine Tails Bubble Tea which is owned by a primary school friend of mine.
Always support local and support friend’s businesses.
I was writing this during my gap time commuting to work. Sometimes I think back, everyone just envied the lives of Entrepreneurs but no one exactly knows the pain and fears behind one’s hard work to build a budding team, dream and perhaps, an empire.
For 1st time Entrepreneur, it will always be a steep learning curve where every steps and the path is relatively unknown but on another hand, I think it would be exciting.
I always believe finding a mentor to guide will help if one do not have the gift of business acumen as experiences will help to build it.
Sometimes I would to travel back time and advise my younger self,
I would say,
Start early because the first mover advantage will definitely help in Business.
And also be a bigger person.
People will laugh at your idea, shame your idea, put you down and etc. Dont bother to argue. The time spent to argue can be out into better use to build the business.
The biggest takeaway that I learnt during this tenure would be, the ability to say no and the ability to walk away. Both sometimes coincide but again, it takes a courage to say NO in Business.
When everyone always praised, “I wish that I can also earn this amount as you.” and all the I wish that I am you. But none will actually look beyond to realise whats the amount of efforts to reach where one is today. If one actually says, “I lauded your efforts and perseverance.” Most prolly, he/she is an Entrepreneur too.
So, support small and local business. You are helping one to build that dream and collectively build a sustainable business.
Thus I made it a point to support a friend’s business first prior to anything else. 🙂
Had a bad week battling the haze and inflammation thus I decide to make some desserts for the family.
Recipe: Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies
Konnyaku Jelly Powder 120gm
Ready-to-drink Birdnest x 2 Bottles
Boil a pot of water (~1litre) and when the water started to boil, put in the Chrysanthemum Flowers and the Honeycomb Sugar. [I would remove the Honeycomb Sugar if I’m pouring in Birdnest as I prefer it to be less/ not too sweet.]
Let it boil for 15 minutes under low fire.
Off the fire and remove the Chrysanthemum Flowers.
Put in the Wolfberries, let it simmer down for 15 minutes.
Pour in the Konnyaku Powder, stir and mix the powder under low fire for 10 minutes.
Pour the Birdnest in. [You may skip this step if you are not a fan of birdnest.]
Off the fire and prepare the molds.
Pour the mixture into the molds and put it in the fridge.
Let it sit for 6 hours. [I actually put this into the freezer for 1 hour and then shift it to the fridge to cut short the time.]
Serve while it’s chilled. 🙂
The girls had helped me with the above and it seems fund as a bonding activity over the weekends. 🙂
Benefits of the Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies:
Chrysanthemum is cooling and is used to treat respiratory issues, high blood pressure, and hyperthyroidism and was said to reduce inflammation and calm ones’ nerves. Wolfberry is high in antioxidants and in Traditional Chinese Medicine, it is good for tired eyes. Bird’s Nest boost better immunity, more energy, better sleep, good complexion, and good virility. Also, regular consumption of Bird’s Nest helps prevent colds and flus.
Sometimes we looked back and realized how time flies…
There is a period where we religiously RSVP to (1) 21st birthday parties
then evolved to (2) tons of weddings where it slowly becomes (3) house warmings with the beautiful decors. THEN happiness overshadows with (4) babies full month celebrations followed by a leveled-up of (5) kids birthday parties.
and we reach a point where we can locate hospital wards with ease due to many (6) hospital visits but soon you realized at times, old friends will gather at (7) funerals to reminisce the past.
This is life. We need to go through life however experiences help us grow through life at the end of the day.
Reach a point that people (like myself) can easily sob because of past experiences one can relate.