Life, Rants

Mental Health for Adults

Earlier on, I shared about the Mental Health for Kids. And there is particular an incident that I wished I had moments prior to speak about in any case, this post is dedicated to a friend/ brother who had passed on due to a sudden death 10 days earlier (on 10.10) and it reminded me on how I dealt with my own depression in the past.


Saw this post on Facebook and I can totally relate.

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At the end of the day, it’s all about SELF-WORTH. Not everyone can see your worth and you need to walk away from all these negative people and sometimes these negative people could be your closest kin, your parents, your another half, your kids, your siblings.


WALK AWAY.

If they never appreciate every single thing that you did or praise you ever. They never will. Truth hurts but as a strong-minded individual, the ability to walk away is the first step to curb. Cry if you want. Scream if you want. But do note that there will always be someone who will appreciate you. It takes time to find this person though. Wait for it to happen as it will come eventually. Don’t rush into things. Walk away when they say/ mention nasty words.

COMMUNICATE.

You are not alone. Speak to your closest friends or random strangers. I always feel that finding random strangers to speak to, will lessen my burden and reduce the pressure that I had been shouldering. It helps and there are various channels to keep anonymity.

  • Samaritans of Singapore: 1800-221-4444 (24 hours)
  • Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800-283-7019
  • Institute of Mental Health: 6389-2222 (24 hours)
  • Care Corner Singapore Counselling hotline (Mandarin): 1800-3535-800
  • You can email me at willynn.ng@gmail.com as an alternative to Aunt Agony.

DON’T GIVE UP.

Mental Health is just like a common illness similar to fever and cough. Once treated, you will be fine. Don’t be bothered by the ancient taboo that you are crazy once you are diagnosed with mental illness.

Remember life is a sacred thing that one can ever ask for. Look at the patients with cancer, they are constantly fighting to win another moment of their lives. So don’t give up this gift of life that you have dearly.

YOU CAN DO IT. And we can do it together to overcome it. Jiayou!

Death will not solve any issues instead it will make things worst as your surviving kins will need to deal with the loss and heartache constantly.

I once felt tired of life and resorted to self harm but I’m thankful for all my family and friends who had pulled me up during my darkest days.

Otherwise, I would have been six feets under.

Life, Rants

Ichi-go Ichi-e

Based on Wikipedia, Ichi-go Ichi-e or 一期に一度 (一期一会); This describes a cultural concept of treasuring the unrepeatable nature of a moment. The term has been translated as “for this time only,” and “once in a lifetime.”

The term reminds people to cherish any gathering that they may take part in, citing the fact that any moment in life cannot be repeated; even when the same group of people gets together in the same place again, a particular gathering will never be replicated, and thus each moment is always a once-in-a-lifetime experience.


Last week, I was in Osaka for the company trip, on the 2nd last day after the indoor team bonding (gonna be indoors due to the typhoon), we went to MAIKOYA to learn about the traditional tea ceremony. To be honest, as a Chinese Tea Ceremony Master, I had always wanted to know how interesting a Japanese Tea Ceremony would be like and what are the differences.

I googled about MAIKOYA prior to the trip and it seems to be the go-to place as it was listed one of the top places to visit (other than Osaka Castle) to learn and understand about the Japanese culture.

And prior to the start of the ceremony, the Tea Master shared about the formality and highlighted these words; 一期一会 that lingers in my mind. In short, the current moment will never re-appear as the same despite having the same group, same settings. Each moment is unique.

Indeed, perhaps I should use this as my opening speech when I do my sales pitch in the near future.

And during the difficult time that I will share in my next post, these words sank deeply within me and the trip entails another perspective of the lesson behind:

CHERISH EVERY SINGLE MOMENT.

Indeed. Some pictures of the moment that I had captured.

I realised Japanese Tea Ceremony focuses a lot on inner meditation of self (that Zen moment) and the procedures were elaborated to focus not on the formality but the respect for one, Mother Nature and the guest/ host.

Remember, ichi-go, ichi-e.

 

Life, Rants, Reflections

Happy Birthday!

When I crossed my 30th mark, I realised that everything/ anyone else don’t matter except for the immediate family.

It was also in times of desperate measures and needs that I realised, no one will stay by you except family and soul mates.

Having say that I would like to dedicate this post to my smelly brother, Marco. :X

We could have been twins if I’m born in Jan tho, with us just 11 months apart. This smelly brother had been my sidekick for the whole of my happy, sad, angsty and etc of my super memorable childhood, be it the ups or downs.


I managed to dig up some pictures. For obvious reasons, I picked those that I look quite chio in. LOL.

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Le Brother, Pattie, Wilson & Me
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Marco’s 21st Birthday

Actually hor, if you are reading this, I do know that you are quite intellectual just that previously too lazy to study, otherwise, I think you would have become a high flyer than me.

Anyway I made this special dedication to him because I had seen him revolved from a playful gamer to someone who worked super duper hard for the family despite not having much certs. 

Honestly, I think that the workaholic genes run in our blood and to someone who had walked up from where we fall, we can grow and appreciate better in life.

Really grateful to have you as my bloody yandao sidekick for the past 30 years!

Happy 30th Birthday!

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Ok, last picture of the Superman. 🙂

Enjoy your BKK trip and have tons of fun!

Life, ongsisters, Parenthood, Rants, Reflections

Mental Health for Kids

Sidenote: Opinions are my own.

I chanced upon the two articles during the week and was discussing this prior to a quick Children’s’ Day celebration with the girls earlier.

The first article is about two 11-years old who had gone missing on 30 September 2019 and was found emotionally unharmed after a grueling 30-hours+ at where they are last seen.

The second article is about a mum who had complained to the Minister for Education on the purpose of setting tough PSLE questions.

And some, even went to the extent to commit suicide over bad grades and critics.

The conversation with the girls especially Sharanne set me thinking about the expectations from (1) Parents, (2) Childrens/ Peer Pressure and lastly (3) the Society.

From Kids’ perspective, they only see as Exams, Stress, Breakdown.

On a legit note, the girls always shared with me that the majority of their friends had super packed schedule for the week and near to 90% are focusing on academics, some took up the music schedules as parents assume that it was a form of de-stress and based on the instrument that the parents like instead of what the kids love. And the reason?

They are too young to make decision so as Parent we have the responsibility to plan out for them.

Precisely. And that’s also the point that they are young that they might not be capable enough to handle the stress and negative emotions.

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What we see from the external is different from what’s within.

So it set me thinking, what went wrong and what could we (as Parents) have done better?

I have friends who are on #TeamTuitionIsLife where Tuition plays a major big role in their lives and its everything they that do. The removal of tuition will make them “handicap” and unable to move on positively. Kids of #TeamTuitionIsLife normally have no much choices on their own and would need to obey the lesson plans crafted out by their parents, for their own good. Sounds familiar? Out of 10 friends, 8 of them fall into this category.

The remaining minority belongs to the #ChillMom where everything is possible and I belong to this category. Not even a single class of tuition/ enrichment and every weekend is just time spent with the kids.

I personally think that sometimes some kids will need enrichment to facilitate and motivate learning but don’t overdo it. Find a right balance. Keep the signs in check. Mentality is important for parents. Don’t yell and threaten on bad grades. It ain’t everything.

Kids felt more stress when parents compare as the (2) Peer Pressure is real. And just to be honest that kids are more sheltered as per compare to the kids 20-30 years ago. The latte developed grit to deal with things while kids of today need some parental grips, making them more vulnerable to critics.

I guess I focus on the different aspects – Soft Skills where I call it the EQ instead of IQ (Academics). The girls had been taught, social media skills, entrepreneurship, customer relations, product different and etc… Importantly I feel that parents need to teach kids how to manage failure or in nicer words, I call it, managing the not ideal situation. That’s why I curated Little Towkay Entrepreneurs Bootcamp for the kids, in order to give them a more holistic experience.

Acceptance is important. I do not have the greatest mind and will never do well in Maths in this lifetime. What I can do is to accept this weakness and hunt for my strengths. I can’t possibly force myself to be a Mathematician. Grades are not everything.

That’s why if I believed my kids can do well in Arts. The focus and the shift will be towards the SOTA direction. Afterall, who’s gonna teach the future generations the arty farty stuff if EVERYONE focus on the academics? Who’s going to teach ballet when everyone graduated as a lawyer or doctor? 😉

There’s always a Master in every profession, tio bo?

Afterall, I would rather spend the time and money spent on something that they love, so that Iwould get a positive ROI. Otherwise I’ll be waste my time and money on something that they do not even like/ love a teeny tiny bit and worst, do not learn from or make no change to one’s life.

Having 4 kiddos and to balance on that economy of scale is hard. Need to maximize the assets so I would emphasize on:

  1. Getting them to learn something that they love.

  2. Tell them Academics is not everything. Attitude is.

  3. Accepting failures (and not scoring more than 85/ 100 is ok)

  4. Enjoy their childhood. 🙂

Personally, this is what I would do and remind myself to do better than to surrender and join the #TeamTuitionIsLife.

No doubts, Society play a part too. We need more parents like this to overturn the mentality that focus strongly on grades and adapt more towards character development.

To parents out there, don’t let anything or anyone guilt trip you. The most important thing that you can provide to the kids is your time and love. 😊

Parents gonna walk the talk before a change is well-noted within the education system and system takes time.

Hey mama! 🙂

Hit me up if you are keen in the Children Bootcamp.

Life, Rants, VFood

[VFood Review] Warung Ijo – Updates on Menu

Earlier on, I wrote my review on Warung Ijo via here.

And so last Saturday, I went back after hearing that they had introduced some soupy dishes and here is my verdict. Sedap for the soup. 😉

Shall let the pictures do the talk.

Updated menu, the old menu still exist but I think the new set of 3 is easier to reference with a picture by its side.

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I ordered:

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Nasi Lemak Fried Chicken
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Mee Soto (I opted for the less spicy and you can ask for spicy version if you can tahan)
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Kolo Mee with Shredded Chicken & Gyoza Soup
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Cold Brewed Tea – Osmanthus Sencha with PassionFruit

The spiciness of both the Kolo Mee and Mee Soto can be adjusted in accordance to personal preference. And the soup had a strong savory flavour despite me asking it to be less or no chilli. AND the bonus — they did put up the Kolo Mee Instant Noodles via the Pick&Go section of the shop. So if one is keen to buy it home, just order via the counter. 😉

And I’m fazed by the cold brewed tea selection that Gryphon Tea has. 🙂

Anyway to me, if I’m around the corner, I would definitely go and get my bubble tea fix at Nine Tails Bubble Tea which is owned by a primary school friend of mine.

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My Rose Oolong with 0% Sugar & No Toppings

Always support local and support friend’s businesses. 

Life, Rants, Work

Entrepreneurship, was never an easy feat.

I was writing this during my gap time commuting to work. Sometimes I think back, everyone just envied the lives of Entrepreneurs but no one exactly knows the pain and fears behind one’s hard work to build a budding team, dream and perhaps, an empire.

For 1st time Entrepreneur, it will always be a steep learning curve where every steps and the path is relatively unknown but on another hand, I think it would be exciting.

I always believe finding a mentor to guide will help if one do not have the gift of business acumen as experiences will help to build it.

Sometimes I would to travel back time and advise my younger self,

I would say,

Start early because the first mover advantage will definitely help in Business.

And also be a bigger person.

People will laugh at your idea, shame your idea, put you down and etc. Dont bother to argue. The time spent to argue can be out into better use to build the business.

The biggest takeaway that I learnt during this tenure would be, the ability to say no and the ability to walk away. Both sometimes coincide but again, it takes a courage to say NO in Business.

When everyone always praised, “I wish that I can also earn this amount as you.” and all the I wish that I am you. But none will actually look beyond to realise whats the amount of efforts to reach where one is today. If one actually says, “I lauded your efforts and perseverance.” Most prolly, he/she is an Entrepreneur too.

So, support small and local business. You are helping one to build that dream and collectively build a sustainable business.

Thus I made it a point to support a friend’s business first prior to anything else. 🙂

Life, Parenthood, Recipe, VFood

Beat the Haze with Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies

Had a bad week battling the haze and inflammation thus I decide to make some desserts for the family.

Recipe: Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies

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Konnyaku Jelly Powder, Wolfberries, Honeycomb Sugar, Chrysanthemum & Birdnest

 

Ingredients:

  • Konnyaku Jelly Powder 120gm
  • Chrysanthemum Flowers
  • Honeycomb Sugar
  • Wolfberries 10gm
  • Ready-to-drink Birdnest x 2 Bottles

Instructions:

  1. Boil a pot of water (~1litre) and when the water started to boil, put in the Chrysanthemum Flowers and the Honeycomb Sugar. [I would remove the Honeycomb Sugar if I’m pouring in Birdnest as I prefer it to be less/ not too sweet.]
  2. Let it boil for 15 minutes under low fire.
  3. Off the fire and remove the Chrysanthemum Flowers.
  4. Put in the Wolfberries, let it simmer down for 15 minutes.
  5. Pour in the Konnyaku Powder, stir and mix the powder under low fire for 10 minutes.
  6. Pour the Birdnest in. [You may skip this step if you are not a fan of birdnest.]
  7. Off the fire and prepare the molds.
  8. Pour the mixture into the molds and put it in the fridge.
  9. Let it sit for 6 hours. [I actually put this into the freezer for 1 hour and then shift it to the fridge to cut short the time.]
  10. Serve while it’s chilled. 🙂

The girls had helped me with the above and it seems fund as a bonding activity over the weekends. 🙂

Benefits of the Chrysanthemum Wolfberries Jellies:

Chrysanthemum is cooling and is used to treat respiratory issues, high blood pressure, and hyperthyroidism and was said to reduce inflammation and calm ones’ nerves. Wolfberry is high in antioxidants and in Traditional Chinese Medicine, it is good for tired eyes. Bird’s Nest boost better immunity, more energy, better sleep, good complexion, and good virility. Also, regular consumption of Bird’s Nest helps prevent colds and flus.